What did I get myself into?

When I "signed on" to be my mother-in-law's caregiver I didn't fully realize what that would entail.  I knew my father-in-law did things for her, but I figured it was mostly just getting her food and making sure her blood sugar levels were all right.   It's been a lot more than that.

You see my mother-in-law has spent the majority of her 80 years in a recliner.  20+ years ago when I met her, she was mobile, but ate and slept in a recliner.  I didn't think much of it, the sleeping seemed a little weird, but to each their own.   She was walking and taking care of herself.  About 10 years ago she broke her leg.  She is not a tiny woman, so getting around became almost impossible.   Because of her diabetes and how she managed it (not well), my father-in-law didn't want her to get out of the chair very often because if she had a low blood sugar she would fall.

You know the fairytale: Jack sprat could eat no fat and his wife could eat no lean......well that is them.   Now my father-in-law was a strong man in his day, but he is definitely lean.   At 75-80 it was beginning to take a toll on him, probably long before that.   He couldn't lift her and would have to call for help, whether it be from a friend or 911.  So the chair became her way of life.   Eventually, she moved to a lift recliner, because it made it easier for her to get out of it, especially on days when she wasn't feeling very strong.

Fast forward to now.  We knew she basically didn't leave the house anymore except for doctor's appointments.   When my husband went back to help get them ready to move out here he got to see first hand how bad things had truly gotten.  He tried to give me a heads up, but until you are actually in the middle of it, you really have no idea what to expect.   It's like having a baby to take care of again, a very large baby.  The only difference......in most cases, you have time to prepare and are looking forward to your new bundle of joy.  It's usually something you have planned for.

While we knew that at some point we would be taking care of them, it still came about rather suddenly.   Thankfully, we had put in a handicap bathroom in the area where my mother-in-law would be staying because we knew we would need it.   But it seemed like overnight it happened.  One day I was looking forward to spending time with my husband as the kids were grown, and the next I was thrust back into the role as caregiver to a baby.  Back to wiping butts and giving baths.   Suddenly I was at another person's beck and call, want and need.

Taking care of your parents is not an easy task by any means.  It is a big commitment and responsibility and one not to take on flippantly, but, it is the right thing to do.   And as much as my mother-in-law drives me crazy, I still choose this over putting her in a home.   That doesn't mean that won't happen, but for as long as we are able we will take care of her.